Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Masturbation: A Lesson in Sensuality
Masturbation is a great practice in being more sensual. It is also a way to get to know your body, the spots that make you moan a little louder, what you may not like. This is always good that way you can tell your partner. I strongly believe that you have to know how to please yourself in order for anyone else to be able to do it. Women are responsible for their pleasure. Your partner is a tremendous help but you have to know what makes you feel good.
Masturbation can help you to have more appreciation for your body and its own beauty. You will begin to appreciate how it feels, how it looks, every part of it, how it smells, how it moves. Learning how to be intimate with you, in my experience can be one of the greatest healing experiences. It can remove blocks or negative thoughts that you may have about sex. It can remove low self esteem, and open the way to powerful orgasms. In combination with other things it has done these for me.
I didn’t always have the most enjoyable sex or orgasms. I liked the closeness and it was fun at times. I liked being with a man, but most of the time sex was for his pleasure. (They never knew that) hehe.
Then one day I decided that was it. Why am I not enjoying every bit of this experience? I did have clitoral orgasms with masturbation, but I wanted it all. I wanted to have an orgasm with a man inside of me. You know all the shaking, and moaning, eyes rolling in the back of the head type of orgasm. (Even though most orgasms are different) I am too fine and sensual not to be having orgasms. I deserve to be thoroughly pleased as well. So I went on a mission.
The thing is to have all of these benefits that I mentioned you have to take time. You can not just want to rush to the orgasm. You can not go to work relentlessly on your yoni (vagina) being impatient and harsh and expect results. Be gentle and loving, freaky and nasty if that’s what you like. But do not beat up on your self.
A few techniques which will be in my book are helpful and reminders to be the sensual you, savoring every bit of your experience.
1. Set the mood with candles, your favorite music, scents etc.
2. Take a nice sensual bath making sure to touch all of the crevices you have neglected
3. Look at your body in the mirror. Don’t be negatively judgmental, if there are things you do not like pass them or find beauty. Pay attention to the things you like and think how beautiful and sexy you are. Even do a seductive dance. Learn how to turn yourself on. (you will find ways in my upcoming book)
4. Lay down in your setting and touch yourself sensually. Think thoughts that turn you on. Think how sexy and sexual you are and will be. Get yourself real HOT. Use feathers and fabric, oils and lotions.
5. In my case I wanted to experience a vaginal orgasm so after I was completely boiling and wet I used a cucumber. Yes I was getting my veggies a whole new way! I moved it to all the spots that felt sensitive that felt good and kept it in those spots. Ah man in no time I was moaning louder and shaking uncontrollably. I felt empowered. I felt beautiful and sexual. I felt flirtatious and like a true goddess.
I can not go into it in great detail here but pleasing yourself can be the greatest gift you can give to you. It is a well needed and liberating journey into self love.